Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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