STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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