I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
