i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
accomplished twins. life is a go
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
