just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
