i jhust puked up my retainher.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
