I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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