Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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