Just mADE A PArabola og urine
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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