just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
