i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
either way he was missing a nipple.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
