Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
