Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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