there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
