Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
