BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
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