he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
