There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
We have so much sex to catch up on
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
