I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
