Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
