called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
