so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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