oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
