i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Randomize
