My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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