I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Randomize
