glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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