problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
She needs sedatives and a leash
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
