don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
