i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
