wakey wakey hands off snakey
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
