And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
