I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
