white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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