Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
operation have a gay friend backfired
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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