Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
