Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i would punch a child for taco bell
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
