i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
