yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Randomize
