Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
