you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
