i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I'm bleeding and have questions
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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