just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
