Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
