Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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