belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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