I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
