found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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