There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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