new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
